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Music

38: Goodbye Yellow Brick Road (Elton John)

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Album: Goodbye Yellow Brick Road
Artist: Elton John
Year: 1973

1. Funeral for a Friend/Love Lies Bleeding
2. Candle in the Wind
3. Bennie and the Jets
4. Goodbye Yellow Brick Road
5. This Song Has No Title
6. Grey Seal
7. Jamaica Jerk-Off
8. I’ve Seen That Movie Too
9. Sweet Painted Lady
10. The Ballad of Danny Bailey (1909-34)
11. Dirty Little Girl
12. All the Girls Love Alice
13. Your Sister Can’t Twist (But She Can Rock ‘n’ Roll)
14. Saturday Night’s Alright for Fighting
15. Roy Rogers
16. Social Disease
17. Harmony

Most double-albums contain a lot of filler and Goodbye Yellow Brick Road is no exception. Thankfully, the filler is mostly okay and the rest is excellent, so Elton gets the only double-album for this countdown.

Funeral for a Friend is a risky way to begin the album, being an instrumental, but it segues into the appropriately titled Love Lies Bleeding, a classic rocker. They combine for an epic anthem that make you feel like you’ve played an entire album when it’s over, only there’s sixteen songs left. Things stay strong from there with the superior version of Candle in the Wind. I don’t really care about Marilyn Monroe, but it’s a touching tribute nonetheless. Bennie and the Jets has grown on me over the years, mostly thanks to the song’s unique rhythm. And then you have my favorite song by Elton, the title track. The melody is insanely gorgeous, and the lyric is a unique view of the city mouse/country mouse dichotomy. Only Elton can sing “horny back toad” in a ballad and get away with it.

It’s hard for the rest of the album to match the intensity of the first four songs, but it does its best. This Song Has No Title doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, but it’s quite catchy. Grey Seal has a pleasant pop melody. And I don’t even mind Jamaica Jerk-Off, despite my general dislike of the classic Jamaican beat. It leaves be with a better taste, anyway, than I’ve Seen That Movie Too, which repeats the chorus way too many times and isn’t terribly interesting either.

The second album starts off with a song about a hooker who services sailors, and of course it has probably the album’s sweetest sounding melody. And if Goodbye Yellow Brick Road ended here, it would likely make my top 20. But it goes on, and on, and on. Danny Bailey is a generic gunfighter song. Your Sister Can’t Twist is a generic rocker. Saturday Night’s Alright for Fighting sounds really good but isn’t terribly interesting. Roy Rogers is a generic cowboy song; it sounds nice, but the lyric doesn’t match that of Candle in the Wind. Social Disease and Harmony also sound good, but don’t do much to stand out. The two exceptions are Dirty Little Girl and All the Girls Love Alice. The former has incredibly misogynistic lyrics, and even though I’m sure Elton sang it ironically, it just sounds awful. And the latter is about a adultery and statutory rape and doesn’t paint a pretty picture of lesbians. If the melody wasn’t do damn catchy I’d probably color it blue as well.

Music

39: All the Pain Money Can Buy (Fastball)

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Album: All the Pain Money Can Buy
Artist: Fastball
Year: 1998

1. The Way
2. Fire Escape
3. Better Than It Was
4. Which Way to the Top?
5. Sooner or Later
6. Warm Fuzzy Feeling
7. Slow Drag
8. G.O.D. (Good Old Days)
9. Charlie, the Methadone Man
10. Out of My Head
11. Damaged Goods
12. Nowhere Road
13. Sweetwater, Texas

I bought this album after hearing and enjoying The Way and Fire Escape. I quickly grew to like Out of My Head but it was then subsequently overplayed on the radio. I still listen to the album because the non-singles are so darn consistent.

Warm Fuzzy Feeling is probably the shortest song on this countdown that is oranged up, clocking in at just under two minutes. Catchy, and lyrically interesting.  Sweetwater, Texas is a beautiful, haunting ballad and rounds out the rest of the album well.

I’m trying to figure out why Good Old Days is abbreviated G.O.D., since the initials are never used in the song (unlike P.Y.T. by Michael Jackson). Is it just a God reference? I’m generally not a fan of parentheticals in song titles as they just become unnecessarily unwieldy, and it makes even less sense here.

Music

40: Forget About It (Alison Krauss)

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Album: Forget About It
Artist: Alison Krauss
Year: 1999

1. Stay
2. Forget About It
3. It Wouldn’t Have Made Any Difference
4. Maybe
5. Empty Hearts
6. Never Got Off the Ground
7. Ghost in This House
8. It Don’t Matter Now
9. That Kind of Love
10. Could You Lie
11. Dreaming My Dreams With You

I remember my first migraine. I was about 21 or so and I was driving home and thought it was just a regular headache, but it got so bad that I could barely open my eyes without it feeling like daggers were piercing through my skull. I tried to make myself dinner but half-way through nearly vomited. So I took some Excedrin, drank some water, turned off all the lights, and popped in my dad’s CD of Forget About It. Within twenty minutes, my migraine was gone.

Alison’s voice is angelic here, and it’s obvious within seconds. Stay and Forget About It are an amazing one-two punch. Annoyingly, the third song is a flop in lyric and tone, but she redeems herself with Maybe, my favorite song of hers. The rest of the album is less impressive, especially musically, but it remains very relaxing throughout. Could You Lie is my next favorite, with Never Got Off the Ground and It Don’t Matter Now also solid.

Music

41: Gasoline (Theory of a Deadman)

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Album: Gasoline
Artist: Theory of a Deadman
Year: 2005

1. Hating Hollywood
2. No Way Out
3. No Surprise
4. Quiver
5. Santa Monica
6. Better Off
7. Say Goodbye
8. Hello Lonely (Walk Away From This)
9. Me & My Girl
10. Since You’ve Been Gone
11. Hell Just Ain’t the Same
12. Save the Best for Last
13. In the Middle

Signed by Nickelback and sounding very much like them, I’m not a huge fan of this band overall. Their songs all begin to sound the same after a while. Case in point, there are thirteen songs on this album, and I think eleven of them are about a recent breakup. But I really dig several songs here, and there’s none I outright dislike, so the whole album gets spun on a regular basis.

I was turned on to this album thanks to the video game Fahrenheit, as four songs of theirs were highlighted on the soundtrack. Three of those four are in my top 500 songs (and the fourth, No Way Out, is pretty good, too), which probably increased my enjoyment of the game. Santa Monica, objectively, isn’t that original lyrically or musically, but for some reason it really resonates with me. It probably is the least Nickelback sounding song on the album. Other than those four tracks, my favorite is probably Hating Hollywood, since it belies the fact that Tyler Connolly is about to ambush you with tortuous tales of his recent relationship.

The version of this album I have unfortunately hides all of the cursing. While there isn’t much, it really ruins the song No Surprise. Thankfully, I also have the Fahrenheit soundtrack, so I was able to combine them for a full, uncensored album.

Music

42: Whatever and Ever Amen (Ben Folds Five)

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Album: Whatever and Ever Amen
Artist: Ben Folds Five
Year: 1997

1. One Angry Dwarf and 200 Solemn Faces
2. Fair
3. Brick
4. Song for the Dumped
5. Selfless, Cold, and Composed
6. Kate
7. Smoke
8. Cigarette
9. Steven’s Last Night in Town
10. Battle of Who Could Care Less
11. Missing the War
12. Evaporated

Ben Folds doesn’t have the best voice in rock, but gosh darn it he sounds exactly the same live as he does on his albums. And he can freakin’ play the piano. There’s probably not a piano bar player that couldn’t play his songs upon request, though unfortunately, most people aren’t too familiar with his work and that’s a shame.

The band’s second album begins with my favorite “to the people who told me I’d never make it: fuck you” song, and it only heats up from there. Fair might be my favorite song where the chorus has no words and is simply Ben singing “Buh, bah, bah!” repeatedly. Then you get probably his most famous song, Brick, an autobiographical tale about his high-school girlfriend’s abortion.

Song for the Dumped is just pure vitriol and great if you’re in the mood for it, not so much if you’re not. Selfless, Cold, and Composed is a extremely low-tempo, more even-tempered break-up song, and an amazing ballad at that. It initially didn’t do anything for me, but has really grown on me over the years.

Sadly, the album mostly sputters at this point until Steven’s Last Night in Town, which sports the lyric “Won us over with stories, about Linda McCartney; lost points with the ladies, for saying he couldn’t love a woman with cellulite.” I couldn’t care less about the next song, nor much for the next one either, as Missing the War is unbearably slow and Ben’s voice doesn’t sound so hot on the track, either. The album is saved at the end by Evaporated, a painful ballad that hints at a very dark secret that’s never revealed.

Like many of Ben’s albums, Whatever and Ever Amen is uneven, but there’s just too much awesome not to count it among my favorites.

Music

43: Sports (Huey Lewis & The News)

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Album: Sports
Artist: Huey Lewis & The News
Year: 1983

1. The Heart of Rock & Roll
2. Heart and Soul
3. Bad Is Bad
4. I Want a New Drug
5. Walking on a Thin Line
6. Finally Found a Home
7. If This Is It
8. You Crack Me Up
9. Honky Tonk Blues

Is there anyone that sings really corny lyrics with as much earnestness as Huey Lewis? You can just tell how much he is feelin’ it when belting out lines like “neon lights, and the pretty, pretty girls, all dressed so scantily.” It’s a good thing, too. Because if he didn’t believe in his songs, they wouldn’t be near as good.

Nostalgia likely boosted this rating a little bit as it’s the first album that I memorized the lyrics to as a child. Every song on here begs you to sing along, especially Bad Is Bad with the “a rit-dit-dit-dit-do-wa-wa” in between verses. Heart and Soul is my favorite song of his after Power of Love. And while I’ve grown just a bit tired of them due to radio overplay, I still enjoy I Want a New Drug and If This Is It.  The album’s weakest offering is the last song (where have we heard this?), a cover of a Hank Williams song that should have been left a Hank Williams song. Huey’s version sucks the life right out of it despite it being competently produced.

I’m not a big fan of the band’s other two big selling albums, Picture This and Fore! Huey’s range is pretty limited and I think he used all of it up on this album. But I still dig it.

Music

44: Thriller (Michael Jackson)

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Album: Thriller
Artist: Michael Jackson
Year: 1982

1. Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’
2. Baby Be Mine
3. The Girl Is Mine (with Paul McCartney)
4. Thriller
5. Beat It
6. Billie Jean
7. Human Nature
8. P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)
9. The Lady in My Life

I was tempted to place this album higher simply because it might be the best pure pop album ever. But it’s still pop music, and I have to be in a rare mood for it. I must admit, though, that usually when I listen to this album I am still in awe at Michael Jackson’s talent. I don’t much care for Off the Wall, and while I like Bad quite a bit, there are a few songs I skip so it didn’t make the countdown. Thriller doesn’t miss a beat.

Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’ is a perfect start to the album, showcasing Michael’s musical talents and showing off the best of 80’s synthesizer beats. Baby Be Mine is a sweet if unmemorable ballad. The Girl Is Mine is annoyingly catchy, like I Want it That Way by the Backstreet Boys, only with better singers. I roll my eyes when Michael and Paul have their “talk” but it fits with the silliness of the song.

After that the album gets epic. Thriller is what pop is all about, and the music video was mesmerizing when I was growing up. Beat It is a great sing-a-longer, though I’ve soured a bit on it over the years, mostly because the chorus is repeated one too many times. But all is forgiven with Billie Jean, the best example of Michael’s singing and writing. A very personal song, emotionally resonating, but poppy enough that it doesn’t change the attitude of the album. Human Nature is a fairly new song for me, but one I’m pretty nuts about. And P.Y.T. is catchy as well, much like the first song on the album.

Unfortunately, the album ends with a whimper, as The Lady in My Life is too slow and too boring, especially at this spot. It’s not a terrible song, but it does nothing to distinguish itself and it’s one I sometimes skip. Still, like the best of pop music, it’s hard not to be in a good mood after spinning Thriller.

Music

45: New Miserable Experience (Gin Blossoms)

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Album: New Miserable Experience
Artist: Gin Blossoms
Year: 1992

1. Lost Horizons
2. Hey Jealousy
3. Mrs. Rita
4. Until I Fall Away
5. Hold Me Down
6. Cajun Song
7. Hands are Tied
8. Found Out About You
9. Allison Road
10. 29
11. Pieces of the Night
12. Cheatin’

Did you know Gin Blossoms started their career in 1989 and are still touring? Did you also know that in 24 years they’ve only released five albums?  That’s amazing to me, and I have to imagine that it was this album, their second (along with, perhaps, some rabid Empire Records fans), that has allowed them to coast on their laurels for all this time. Sporting six singles over three years, New Miserable Experience was certainly anything but for the band.

The music has pretty standard pop melodies, but the lyrics have more originality than most. My favorite song is Allison Road, but I dig pretty much everything on the album to some degree. Lost Horizons and Until I Fall Away are among my favorites. I didn’t care for Hey Jealousy when I thought the song title was “Hey Jessie.”  I liked it immediately when I learned the real lyrics. Funny, that.

I haven’t listened to any of there other albums, though I like the singles just fine on Congratulations, I’m Sorry.

Music

46: Who Needs Pictures (Brad Paisley)

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Album: Who Needs Pictures
Artist: Brad Paisley
Year: 1999

1. Long Sermon
2. Me Neither
3. Who Needs Pictures
4. Don’t Breathe
5. He Didn’t Have to Be
6. It Never Woulda Worked Out Anyway
7. Holdin’ On to You
8. I’ve Been Better
9. We Danced
10. Sleepin’ on the Foldout
11. Cloud of Dust
12. The Nervous Breakdown
13. In the Garden

Around the time Brad Paisley hit the country scene I was bemoaning the loss of the country music I loved in the early 90’s. I was grateful someone who could play guitar and write honest music (that didn’t rely on being a good ol’ boy) was getting radio play. Sadly, Brad is the last new country artist I have an album from, on this countdown or otherwise. I like a song or two from some of the new people, though almost exclusively from the ladies (e.g. Miranda Lambert, The Band Perry), and never an entire album. It all just sounds so samey, poppy, and uninteresting.

That said, I think Brad has been failing a bit as of late. I haven’t particularly enjoyed his last two albums either, partly because he’s now secure enough in his career that the good ol’ boy stuff is coming out. Not Toby Keith territory by any means, but I just have no interest in hearing another singer talk about how awesome being a redneck is.

His first album had none of that, and it’s an amazing debut. Long Sermon is about how annoying it is when a pastor keeps going and going when the weather is gorgeous outside, and he continues with the tongue-in-cheek humor with Me Neither and a couple other songs. What launched his career, however, were his ballads. Who Needs Pictures is a pretty awesome breakup song, and He Didn’t Have to Be is a touching tribute to stepparents. The Nervous Breakdown shows Brad’s mad skills with the guitar, and his version of the classic hymnal In the Garden is way better than any I ever heard in church.

Music

47: Nevermind (Nirvana)

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Album: Nevermind
Artist: Nirvana
Year: 1991

1. Smells Like Teen Spirit
2. In Bloom
3. Come as You Are
4. Breed
5. Lithium
6. Polly
7. Territorial Pissings
8. Drain You
9. Lounge Act
10. Stay Away
11. On a Plain
12. Something in the Way
13. Endless, Nameless (hidden track)

I was too young to appreciate this album when it came out, and I always annoyed that I couldn’t understand half the lyrics in Smells Like Teen Spirit. Plus, I was pretty much anti any music that my grandma would describe as noise. Over the years I began to appreciate Teen Spirit, then grew to really enjoy In Bloom and Lithium. So when I decided to do this countdown, I decided to give this album a once over considering nearly every publication ranks this as one of the top ten albums of all time.

So yeah, I like it. I was pleasantly surprised by the rawness of Breed and the earnestness of Polly. Territorial Pissings does just sound like screaming to me, but the rest of the album remains really good music, even if I can’t understand most of what Cobain is saying. Drain You, On a Plain, and Something in the Way are pretty solid.

I also gave In Utero a shot, but only liked a few of the songs. Apparently, Cobain preferred more screaming and noise than listenable melodies. More power to him, I guess.