20: Mega Man II

Genre: Platformer

Developer: Capcom
Publisher: Capcom
Year: 1988

Basic Idea: Defeat Dr. Wily for the second of infinity times.

Review: I feel kind of dirty ranking this game all the way down at #20.  Most people have it in their top five, and many more have it as their favorite  game of all time.  It is probably hurt by the fact I didn’t have this game as a child and couldn’t obsess over it for years.  I can’t really explain why the game doesn’t move me like it moves others.  But the game is more or less perfect at what it does, and I did enjoy myself quite a bit while playing, so I have no qualms about having it in my top 20.

For those who aren’t aware, you basically control a robotic man equipped with a laser cannon for an arm.  You must traverse several levels in standard platformer style, defeat a boss, then defeat the big bad boss at the end.  What pleased a lot of people (and something I don’t personally care about) is that you can tackle the levels in any order you wish.  There is more than one optimal path through the game, as finishing some levels sooner will give you power-ups that will make other levels easier. While this gives the game replayability in a sense, it doesn’t do much for me as once I win a game, I have little desire to do so in a different manner unless there’s a true alternate path.  For an extreme example, there is a FAQ on how to win Final Fantasy VI while not giving equipment to any player.  If I’m going to play the game again, I’d rather just play it regular and enjoy the story.  Finding a slightly different way to get to the end just for a different challenge does not intrigue me.

That said, the game mechanics are flawless.  Mega Man always does everything you ask him to.  It is a difficult game.  If you have trouble with Super Mario Bros. this game will give you fits.  But it’s not impossible, and way more fair than the first game in the series.  Patience is rewarded, as taking time to use your special abilities (such as levitating platforms) while also conserving them is key to making progress.

The level designs are very creative, the colors bright and inviting.  The music is consistently amazing and a perfect fit for the game.  I am not alone in feeling the series peaked on the NES with this game, and the final four games are mostly derivative.  You certainly don’t need to play the first game in the series to enjoy Mega Man II; in fact, you’re better off skipping it altogether.

21: Baseball Simulator 1.000

Genre: Baseball

Developer: Culture Brain
Publisher: Culture Brain
Year: 1989

Basic Idea:  Finally, a baseball game where cheaters win!

Review:  My favorite baseball game for the NES, Baseball Simulator 1.000 combines solid regular baseball action with awesome power-ups and an ability to create new leagues with custom-made players and a full-season mode.  Pretty much everything one would want in a game is here, and unlike Baseball Stars, the play control isn’t maddening.  While the diving and jumping functions could be better, they are there and are easy to use.

Playing with power-ups can be a blast, especially since you have a limited amount of points to use per game, so you must ration out your super-powers.  The game has pretty much every power-up imaginable, from cannonballs, phantom balls, rocket hits, earthquake balls, tornado pitches, and zig-zag hits, to laser throws, and super high jumping on defense.  You can even select them at the last second, fooling the pitcher or batter.  Hilarity may ensue as you watch your fielders try clumsily to catch a ball that can’t be caught, or your hitter’s bat break if he doesn’t hit the sweet spot of a super pitch.

However, if all the game was crazy antics, it would get old quick.  Season-mode is done to near perfection.  While only six teams are available in a league, there’s really no need for more.  You can determine the length of your season, even play 162 games if you’re up to it.  And each team in a league is fully customizable, from the team’s name to your player’s names, handedness, and their abilities which you’re given an allotment for.  You can even create your own super league and provide players with their own super-abilities.

The gameplay is crisp, about as good as it gets for the NES.  Fielding and throwing are a breeze. Pitching is pretty standard, though unlike a lot of games, fastballs are actually really fast and you have to have quick reflexes.

Another great feature is the variety of stadiums you can play in.  My favorite is Harbor, as you can hit the ball into the ocean or even make a ship blow its horn if you hit it.  There’s also Town, which has some Yankee stadium like fences in left and right where even pitchers can hit homers.  Space, while unfortunately having normal gravity, is also a homer haven with no foul ball room.

My only real criticism of the game, which isn’t unique to this system, is that the CPU is far too easy to beat.  Thus, playing by one’s self can get old pretty quick.  We played as a family, creating our own leagues and obsessing over the stats.

The sequel for the Super Nintendo is improved in several ways, especially with the editing functions, so it’s certainly worth a look if you love this game.

22: R.C. Pro-Am

Genre: Racing

Developer: Rare
Publisher: Nintendo
Year: 1988

Basic Idea: Sneer at the pink car after you accidentally pick up the bombs instead of the missiles.

Review: Easily Rare’s best game (i.e. not frustrating as hell) on the NES, R.C. Pro-Am was probably the first racing game that had any lasting appeal and remains my favorite of the type on the NES.  Pitting your remote control car against three computer opponents, your goal is to finish third or better over the course of 32 tracks.  The tracks have frequent turns, even a few hairpins.  Oil slicks, water, and barriers get in your way, as well as bombs and missiles from your opponents.  Upgrades (like better tires) are also strewn throughout the tracks, as well as temporary turbo strips and roll cages.  Play control is perfect and the sounds are all appropriate.  It’s an easy game to pick and play with a steady learning curve.

My main issue with the game is that once you reach a certain level, the pink car goes into hyperdrive, preventing first place as an option unless you successfully gun it down with missiles several times.  The other opponents also implement catch-up logic and become very difficult to beat as well.  I don’t think I’ve ever won this game without cheating (and by winning I mean starting back over at the beginning with no ending).

I’ve played the sequel briefly; I wasn’t wowed, but it’s certainly fine and probably worth a look if you enjoy this one.  I hear the multiplayer mode in the second game is horrendous.

Play With The Prose II, Challenge 10: Excuse

This week we had to come up with a 59-word story that involved someone making an excuse for someone else.

“I hate math!  I’ll never finish in time!” Jenny threw her notebook on the floor.

Bosco was smart. He didn’t know what Jenny said, but knew she was upset. Not at him, but at the paper.  When Jenny left, Bosco got an idea. He sniffed the paper, determined it was safe, and began chewing.  Jenny would be so proud!

MATTHEW: Awwww, Bosco! You good doggie. I like you and your story, so you would have won even if the dog hadn’t eaten Story 1. WINNER: #2

ANDY: Cute. Nice work getting the character of Jenny across in a short space, it works. And I chuckled. Instant win against a non-sub. I have a feeling this might have been good enough against real competition anyway.

Novak – #2 would have probably won anyway.  I was hoping for something like this, but the execution here is top-notch.

Result vs. Colin Woolston: WIN (3-0)

Current Record: 6-4

Next Match-Up: Will Young (4-6)

My opponent didn’t show up this week, so it was a free win.  Glad the judges liked it besides!

23: Adventures of Lolo

Genre: Puzzle

Developer: HAL
Publisher: HAL
Year: 1989

Basic Idea: Make the Peruvian temple in Raiders of the Lost Ark seem like a playground.

Review:  I more or less described how this game works in my review of its sequels.  It’s a near-perfect puzzle game.  Sadly, they couldn’t help themselves but create one level late in the game that requires dexterity and perfect play control to beat.  I was able to do it, but only after twenty to thirty attempts.  Why it was dumped in a game that required virtually no hand-eye coordination at all is puzzling.  Still, Adventures of Lolo is as about as sure-fire you can get for puzzle lovers.

Play With The Prose II, Challenge 9: Joke

This week we had to tell a joke, or rewrite a joke.  Or something.  Not sure, really.  Anyway, I was contestant #1.

At the last bar in town it felt welcome, the string sat mournfully by the fire, nursing a beer.  It used to be that cheekily shouting “I’m a frayed knot!” would bring laughs, maybe a drink on the house.  Now its usefulness was gone.  After taking one final soak in its Heineken, the string flung itself into the fire.

MATTHEW: Aww. I like story 1! So much pathos for the brief life of a string. And that joke is one of my all-time favorites. But I’m going to give the edge in this week’s competition to folks who actually tried to tell or craft a joke, and that’s absolutely what happened in story 2. It was pretty good too! WINNER: #2

ANDY: I like both of these a lot. Very clever. I enjoyed the matter-of-fact punchline in the second one, so that’s my winner.

Novak – I can tell I’m going to love this challenge.  It might get old by the end, but I’m enjoying it now.  #1 turns in a nice story, and I like putting the joke in the middle for some reason.   I want to reward the creativity of #2, but in this case I feel like the writing is crisper in #1, so #1 wins.

Result vs. Ian Pratt: LOSS (1-2)

Current Record: 5-4

Next Match-Up: Colin Woolston (2-7)

I really dug the idea I came up with, but I’m not entirely sure it was executed as well as it could have been.  At least I lost to guy who has yet to lose to anyone this season.  Hopefully, I can get a rematch in the playoffs.  I’m now alone in 7th place, looking up at three people who are 6-3.

24: Faxanadu

Genre: Action RPG

Developer: Hudson Soft
Publisher: Hudson Soft
Year: 1987

Basic Idea: Come here to buy, come here to sell, and come here to kick some dwarf ass.

Review:  When I first put together my list, I had Faxanadu ranked in the #7 spot.  Last week I decided to play it.  Needless to say, my memory of this game was significantly stronger than reality. It’s still a strong game, but there are enough flaws that #24 seemed like a more accurate place for it.

Like Zelda II, it’s a game that requires too much level-building and has townspeople who are almost completely worthless.  I know this argument could apply to nearly every RPG, but it’s ridiculous that the king and the townsfolk all pray that you will help destroy the evil dwarves and keep their cities from dying, yet they charge you insane amounts of money for weapons, magic, and keys.  There is not a town you can reach in the game where you don’t have to sit right outside it and kill enemies for twenty to thirty minutes just to get enough gold to buy things.    However, compared to a lot of RPGs at the time, twenty to thirty minutes actually seems short.  The game is also not terribly long, either, so the pain is minimized.

A unique aspect of this game is that when you gain enough experience points you are assigned a rank.  The rank doesn’t increase your abilities in any meaningful way; however, when you die with a certain rank, you are revived with a base amount of gold attributed to that rank.  Thus, dying can be convenient if you just want to warp back to the last town you saved at, especially if you have less money than your ranks gives you.  Where this gold comes from and why you’re given it is a mystery, but it can make dying less painful than in other RPGs of the era.

As for the gameplay itself, it’s alternately a blast and frustrating.  There are many times where it is simply impossible to avoid enemies.  Thankfully, though, there are no pits of death to fall into so once you get over the fact that you’ll get hit no matter how good you are, the enemies are generally fun to fight.  Most of the dungeons have a fight or two that requires planning, and the bosses are incredibly well-detailed, especially for 1987.  The most irritating aspect of the game is that there are doors that require keys, and that the doors always re-lock themselves once you’ve used your key.  There is at least one spot in the game that requires you to significantly backtrack to buy a key, because there’s no indication you need to buy an extra one for later.

It mostly sounds like I’m complaining about the game.  To be honest, if you haven’t played this game before, I can’t really recommend it.  It’s far too frustrating when there are way better action RPGs out there that have stories that have more depth and intrigue.  I also don’t think I’ll ever play this game again.  But I had so much fun playing this as a child and it was great entertainment in 1987.  I still enjoyed myself last week, though a lot of that was nostalgia.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone.  Come back on Monday to see what game falls in at #23.

25: Zelda II: The Adventure of Link

Genre: Action RPG

Developer: Nintendo
Publisher: Nintendo
Year: 1988

Basic Idea: Wonder how you can help a poor man named Error while trying to wake princess Zelda.

Review:  There’s video proof of how insanely excited I was to receive this game for Christmas in 1988. Our family had spent countless hours with the first game in the series, and we were primed for more. Imagine our disappointment when we realized that the sequel was virtually nothing like the original game.  It took a while, but I eventually got over it.  It’s a flawed game, but  certainly still worthy of play.

The game’s map is epic.  Zelda II introduced towns to the series, a much welcome addition that makes the game world actually seem believable.  Granted, many of the town denizens speak so cryptically that there advice is worthless, but there’s still fun to be had.  You can learn new spells by visiting new towns, and sometimes you have to puzzle-solve within the town to find certain people.

What’s not so welcome is the RPG like level-building.  Much time is needed fighting the same enemies over and over again to be able to withstand the onslaught in each dungeon.  And the level-building is even more annoying than in your standard RPG, because you have to be more careful (since it’s an action game) and you actually have to seek out your enemies on each action screen. See, the game map is from a bird’s eye view, but when an enemy touches Link, it transports you to a battleground.  This is similar to several SNES RPGs, but each scene takes significant time to wade through, making the game stupidly longer.

The dungeons is where this game shines.  Each one is sprawling, but not maze-like.  The enemies are colorful and gradually get harder throughout the game.  Like the first game, there’s a treasure to find in each one that enhances Link’s ability.  Problem-solving is abundant, sometimes using spells (like turning Link into a fairy!), sometimes using guile.  And the boss battles are a ton of fun.  In fact, the bosses make those in the first game seem like Goombas, not only because they’re more difficult, but because they’re more unique and fun to fight against.

The main downfall in this game, at least for me, is the insanely difficult endgame.  Reaching the final castle is almost impossible, as the final caves have so many lava pits that Link’s Castlevania-like jumping ability often isn’t enough.  The final castle is also complex and difficult, but at least it’s fair. Of course, if you don’t have any lives left, it’s a daunting task.  The final enemy, Link’s shadow, is a worthy opponent unlike Ganon from the first game.  I’ve never won the game without cheats, but I can see how one could do it with enough dedication.

Zelda II is unlike any other game in the series.  Nintendo took a chance, and while I’m glad they went away from this formula for their next game, I appreciate what they tried to do.

26: Little Samson

Genre: Platformer

Developer: Takeru
Publisher: Taito
Year: 1992

Basic Idea: The ultimate tag-team.

Review:  I had never heard of this game until I began doing research for my countdown.  I’m glad that mistake was corrected.

The game begins with four separate characters taking a journey to meet up to defeat some evil thing. You play as a human, a dragon, a rock, and a mouse.  Each has their own specific strengths and weaknesses.  Once they all meet up, you tackle each level with the ability to switch between any of the characters at any time (much like in TMNT).  Need to reach a hard-to-get to spot?  Switch to the mouse.  Need to traverse through spikes without taking damage?  Switch to the rock.  I love the concept, and considering how different the four protagonists are, there is often a big benefit to strategically planning your way through the level rather than just bum-rushing through.

The concept alone is worth a top ten ranking, but the execution isn’t always perfect.  Stage difficulty is seemingly random as you progress, even within stages.  The enemies and bosses are repetitive and uninspiring.  There are some issues with RAM.  There are no power-ups other than increasing your life bar.  And the graphics and music are pretty meh.  Despite how impressed I was at first, I wasn’t terribly sad when the game was over.

Still, it’s a marvelous idea and if you’re looking for a new platformer to play, I can strongly recommend Little Samson.

Play With The Prose II, Challenge 8: Crisis

This week our main character in 59 words had to diffuse a crisis of some sorts.  This week I was contestant #2.

The sun was blackening. His brethren were banging on pots and drums to scare away the dragon. Yang Tsen knew better. His family long held the responsibility of protecting Chengdu and he could think of no greater honor. He handed his katana to his eldest son, kneeled, and awaited his glorious sacrifice. The sun would live another generation.

MATHEW: Story 2 borders on the epic, and it’s really effective storytelling for 59 words. WINNER: #2

Novak – #2 is fantastic. Especially the double entendre in the last line. Ultimate sacrifice, cool fantasy setting… I feel like I haven’t been rewarding these enough this season, since I usually love ‘em, so I’m glad to give #2 the nod this time.

ANDY: #2 is my favorite piece this week, and one of my favorites of the whole competition. Everything is working for me here: setting, voice, character, language, originality. The story is very nicely contained within the word limit as well. I loved it. Easy choice for #2.

Result vs. AMRWIN (3-0)

Current Record: 5-3

Next Match-Up: Ian Pratt (7-1)

For those who aren’t familiar with ancient Chinese history, many apparently believed solar eclipses were the result of a dragon trying to eat the sun.  Yang means “sun” and Tsen means “man of sacrifice.”  It was unintentional that I had a pun in the last line, but I like it all the same.  It wasn’t until later that I realized that katanas are Japanese weapons, and didn’t even exist until the last millennium.  Thankfully, that gaffe didn’t seem to bother the judges.

So, another sweep and a four-week winning streak after starting the season slowly.  I’m still tied in a logjam for the final playoff spot.  Now I have to somehow become the first person to beat Ian (his only loss was a week where he didn’t submit an entry).